Aim to practice Platinum Rule DEI

Too often, I hear claims that DEI doesn’t work. I can’t help but wonder what that means and in whose opinion. A disturbing phenomenon that’s happening is leaders who identify as the majority are making assessments of DEI progress and success according to THEIR own frame of reference because they’re practicing Golden Rule DEI: doing unto others as THEY would have them do unto themselves. And when they don’t get the outcomes, responses, and praise they expect, they consider the efforts to be a failure.

That’s an extremely flawed way of thinking.

I’ve heard complaints like, “We gave them 2 ERGs and they still want more” or “We gave them Juneteenth off and now they’re asking for additional religious holidays.” And what I really hear is, “I gave a concession based on my understanding of what I would consider to be meaningful and it’s still not enough. I’m doing so much and they’re never satisfied. I just can’t win.’

There are way too many ‘I’s’ in that logic.

DEI work is about serving and honoring people who have historically been excluded, not YOUR definition of what inclusion and equity look like to you. The goal here is to treat people the way THEY want to be treated – to do unto others as THEY’D want done unto them. So if you forge ahead without creating an in-depth ongoing dialogue with the people you claim to want to include, you ARE going to keep feeling like you’re missing the mark because you’re operating under your understanding, not theirs. Or you’re going to feel like you’re doing enough without knowing the extent and true meaning of what the people you want to include are looking for. You can only find that out by asking them directly what that is.

So this week I challenge you to think of ways to start that dialogue. And take the feedback you receive as truth. You may be met with more suggestions than you think you can handle but consider them all and set expectations about how and to what extent the requests can be addressed. Because THAT’S what people who have been marginalized want. And they’re the ones whose satisfaction must be the focus.