Dear white men: Ditch “I’m just a white guy”

In conversations about DEI, difference, and identity, I often hear white men say “I’m just a white guy.” And I find it troubling for a few reasons:

1.     As humans, none of us are just 2 things: race and gender. We are all far more complex beings.

2.     The phrase is often used in a self-deprecating way, which contradicts the fact that you’re often trying to shy away from: that you are in a place of privilege in our society.

3.     While it’s often meant to convey humility, it can actually offend people who have been historically excluded. We get what you’re trying to do but let’s be honest – you’re still in a place of power.

4.     In denying your place of power, you may overlook the fact that you have the social capital to make significant change. Don’t shy away from it – assess how you can use it to make change for historically excluded people. Engage in that conversation versus trying to shrink your voice.

5.     It can become an excuse for bowing out of a dialogue that needs your perspective. Without white men contributing, this whole exercise becomes historically excluded people communicating among ourselves, which doesn’t solve the problem. It also denies you the chance to engage in our broader collective human journey of exploring our full identities.

This week, take some time to assess how YOU personally want to show up as a white man. Maybe consider talking about it with other white men who are aspiring allies. And ditch “I’m just a white guy.” Maybe consider saying something different instead like, “I recognize the optics of my identity AND…” and contribute your thought. You have a place in the DEI conversation.